So, leaving Korah that day was dreadful. My heart was broken, I had become attached just in time to leave and worst of all, there was no fix for the pain and despair I witnessed...well, none that I could offer anyway.
I have been home a few months now and still when I think of Day 4, I can't help but grin and get tears in my eyes. It ranks top 10 best days of my life for sure!
When we were preparing for Africa, there was a lot of questions of "why?". "Why me?", "Why now?", "Why Africa?". I tried to listen and just rest in the fact that this opportunity presented itself so perfectly and if there is anything I know about God, I am confident it was all intentional, a part of the plan.
It didn't answer "why?" but I felt more at peace with it. I also felt more excited to GO, I wanted to try to figure out the "why?" to see what was in store for me.
Before we went, I tried to dream up what the answer could be...why did God want to put me in those streets? I can't put my finger on what made me feel this way, but I had a strong feeling like I was being brought to Africa to somehow help with kids who had poor vision.
Let's face it, for the past 3 years Blake's vision has been an uphill battle for us with all of the exams, new prescriptions and visual therapy. It has been a HUGE struggle for us and if I had a choice, it would have been something we never had to deal with. With all of that said; we are SO extremely blessed to have the amazing doctors, ability to get a prescription let alone several, and the means to afford the visual therapy despite NO coverage at all from insurance companies...the blessings are HUGE in even this less-than-ideal situation. When I started thinking about where we would be if Blake never had glasses, I instantly thought of Africa and from that moment, the connection in my heart was made. My son could not function without glasses. There must be children in Africa with vision just as poor, or even worse and worse yet - with NO ability to get help, NO ability to SEE.
I was prepared to go out there and see kids with poor vision and visible struggles. I was prepared to see eye turns and squinting. I had NO clue how I was going to help. I knew NOTHING about the services even available in Ethiopia, let alone the cost or process and THEN you add the fact that these children are mostly orphans with no guardian or caregiver...it was a bit overwhelming to say the least.
I knew one thing; I was ready to help HOWEVER I could.
There was already the start of a vision and dental care plan being started in Korah so I felt somewhat armed and able to give additional ideas and find out HOW I could help support the cause. If the end result was getting the kids of Korah seeing their world, I was all in.
ENTER DAY 4, when it all became clear!
That morning, we were doing our VBS. I had seen my favorite kiddos and even met new children I had never even seen before (the good news was spreading through the village that VBS was going on and more kids came day after day!). I was mid-conversation with another child when out of the corner of my eye, this little girl fell down. She caught my attention, but nothing appeared odd at first glance.
I began to watch her more and more closely and I saw her fall down at least four times. I went over near her and she reached for my hand. When I went to hold her hand, she winced. Her hand had a cut that was swollen and infected, no doubt from a fall. So, the only way I knew to help her was to walk her to the clinic and get her hand cleaned. As we started to walk, we had to exit the VBS building which meant taking a step down, out of the building...she extended her foot out extra far and "felt" her way down the step. I took note. As we walked through the "courtyard" towards the gate she stumbled over a rock, then another. I took note. And then, the moment that I will never forget...we reached the street and she started walking and then she stopped suddenly as a van passed us. That was the FIRST time she had stopped or even slowed...it became VERY clear, it was the first thing she could see.
Not even a minute after my revelation, the tears were streaming down my face. My heart broke for this sweet girl. I pictured her life just trying to walk from her home to the clinic or the VBS...how many times had she fallen and gotten back up. How many cuts have there been and how many had gone untreated? How do you help care for yourself as a child in a village where children are their own caregivers when you can't even see.
The tears were un-stoppable and as we made our way into the clinic. As I passed the members of my team and we made eye contact, they knew something special had happened. Was this the "why?". Maybe my purpose wasn't changing the vision system or lack there of in Ethiopia, maybe just maybe I was brought to this ONE sweet girl to help in her in a way that I could.
Maybe if a problem is too large to solve, you just start with one small solution to one piece of the broken puzzle. And, I guess if you can't see the rocks, you focus on the Vans. You do what you can.
The journey of 1,000 miles begins with one step.
Fitting that the first person I saw outside the clinic doors was Andrea. She was holding two children of her own that needed medical attention.
I waited to talk to the nurse and tried to compose myself. I laugh thinking about that sweet innocent girl and what she must have been thinking as I held her hand, sobbing.
As I talked with the nurse and expressed my concern and passion, the nurse informed me that she was also HIV+. I will never, ever forget the feeling of helplessness when the nurse explained to me that she feared her needs were far beyond glasses. She prepared me for the fact that, it may be much worse for this sweet girl. Glasses weren't a fix all but glasses was a start...one step in a journey that may or may not be 1,000 miles. It was what I could do. The nurse, Kayla helped me figure out roughly how much an eye exam and glasses would cost and told me that she did have a mother and if I left the money with Kayla, she could get word to her mother that there was money at the clinic for her to go to town and see an eye Dr. Andrea offered within seconds to cap off whatever I was short.
We left the clinic for the same dreaded walk back to VBS, this time with a dressed hand and I just remember praying silently the whole time that God would help this sweet girl. He would help get the message out, get her to the Doctor, help Kayla prioritize the money that was left and that even though I was nearing the end of my time there, that THIS one step would be a success for this girl who had touched my heart in such a special way.
......words can't express how these photos make me feel:
BEFORE:
I just got this email THIS MORNING! Bafta got to the Doctor, got her new glasses (and was THRILLED by the way!)
AND, the BEST words I have read in a LONG time
"He said everything looked good she just needed glasses".
It may not be the only answer to the "why?" but, it's one step in the journey of 1,000 miles...I am sure.
